Rejection Is Redirection

Trusting that there is an intended path for you

Written by: Brianna Salzenstein

Sometimes life throws us curveballs. A 98 mph fast one, right to the stomach and every time we are surprised, even if we know there’s a possibility of it coming. Today is February 27th, 2023 and I received a rejection email from the only graduate school I applied to. The funny thing is when I was sending in my application just a month ago, a part of me felt like this wasn’t what was meant for me but instead a catalyst. I am therefore led to believe that not only does our heart, mind and gut always know, but the universe has a far greater plan for each and everyone of us. We just have to believe that the unfolding path is intended for us.

The blow to the ego

I check my email religiously, I wake up and its the first thing I do and before bed it's the last thing my eyes see. I think I do this so often because so many of my proudest accomplishments started with an email of acceptance. Getting into my first art show at 17, being accepted into the college I desperately I wanted to transfer to, and placing first place in a project amongst all my peers. These moments become a reminder to myself that I am capable and others see it too.

But then that curveball comes to humble you. I thought by getting a rejection email from a graduate school just one year prior would make this one easier but it reminds me how much we attach our worth to these external circumstances. I applied to Florida State University one year ago in the beginning of 2022 to pursue Art Curation and got rejected four months after applying. I applied to University of South Florida in January 2023 and got rejected one month later, today.

When you put yourself out into the universe it’s scary. We consider our passions, resumes, and goals as extensions of ourselves, so when we get that rejection email/letter, it feels like a direct hit to who we are. So even if I told myself the possibility was there, prepared it in my mind telling myself all the various outcomes, reminding myself that this doesn’t mean I am not good enough, I still got hit with the “am I not good enough?”

The catalyst rather than the final destination

The series of work I submitted to be judged by a panel people, was seen, analyzed, and taken apart by a room full of eyes. I think the hardest part of getting rejected by something that feels like an extension of who you are is that it innately feels like an attack to your worth. This series of 10 pieces was the most vulnerable artistic expression I have ever displayed and it carried a lot of emotional weight. So when I think about this room full of eyes, reading my story, my process and seeing it come to life, deeming it not worthy of their program that’s what stings the most.

The funny part is I wasn’t entirely set on going back to school, if anything opposite feelings were arising that maybe better art opportunities are unfolding exactly where I am. I just got accepted into a show to display all 10 pieces in this same series, and a whole month exhibiting it in a local space.

If I am honest with myself, this series was created with an intention to apply for school. I had a deadline by January to meet, I spent hours and weeks pressed to get it done and the most dramatic close to it all was that the emotional tie to this work became the greatest ending chapter to a story I wasn’t aware I was writing. (See my Buy Art Not Drugs art page to read this tale)

Having this deadline and purpose to go back to school pushed me to create this work essentially being the catalyst for all these other opportunities arising right where I am. So even if this panel of people might not have deemed it worthy for their program, I know it is not defined by that decision. That bigger and better opportunities are on their way, that the universe has my back and the path is unfolding exactly how it’s supposed to.

Ask yourself

So I challenge you to ask yourself, what external forces are you attaching your worth to? What are some ways you can practice self validation? And how can you remind yourself that rejection is simply redirection?

Epilogue

My hope is that this blog allows you to stop, reflect, and adapt your way of thinking so you can rewrite a narrative for the highest version of you.